Little Miss Sunshine

Over a recent dinner with my parents, my dad stated that I am a "Little Miss Sunshine" in the context of a bodybuilding competition. In case you are not familiar with the movie, it's about a little girl who dreams of competing in a beauty pageant that also includes a performance portion. The only problem is that the little girl is a complete misfit among all the other well-qualified, pretty girls. But this is her dream and she competes anyway, having her moment of fulfillment. I did not take kindly to this comment as I find it hurtful, disrespectful and highly unnecessary. While I do not require anyone's approval or support with this undertaking, I also don't need them to trash my effort. If you can't say something nice, keep your mouth shut. But the net effect is that I'm even more firmly resolved and committed to my goal.

A recent workout clip

Dietary changes

One's diet can always stand a little tweeking, so that's what I've done in the last week. I now do a carb rotation where I make one cup (uncooked), consume it over a few days, then make the next one. I move through a rotation that includes quinoa (they sell it at Costco! Yay!), brown rice, then whole wheat pasta. What I recently discovered is whole wheat orzo which takes pasta to a slightly new place. I put tomato puree on it because it's low sodium and low calorie. I also discovered that canned "pizza sauce" at the grocery store covers those two bases as well. I cheat and put a dusting (or more) of parmesan cheese on it cuz it's important to make your food edible. I also added a new yogurt, one that has twice as much protein as Stoneyfield, my usual brand. It's Chobani and it's Greek - very thick and tasty. So that was an easy switch. The final discovery: Lundberg brand organic brown rice rice cakes. I saw a guy at the bodybuilding show eating one and I tucked it away in the recesses of my mind, which is to say, I kinda forgot about it. But I was at the grocery store standing in front of them and decided to give them a try. With a coating of peanut butter, they go down easily. I'll use them as an occasional snack. Coming soon...a video clip of a recent workout with Glenn (Bodywize).

Weight loss? What weight loss?

I've been eating extremely well for about a month and I haven't lost a pound. Hmmmmm. What's that all about? I'm completely mystified. Glenn (Bodywize Training) told me not to weigh myself every day which was good advice, so I've only been getting on the scale about twice a week. But in the last two weeks, I've dedicated myself to 4 solid weight work outs in the gym (2 with trainers, 2 without) which have certainly raised my heart rate and burned calories. However, this is a departure from what I formerly did which was 3 days of weights in the gym, 3 days of cardio. I fully intended to reinstate some cardio, it was just a matter of when and I think the time is now. I subtracted it because I didn't want to overdo the exercise at the beginning and burn myself out. I thought my gym workouts would be of an intensity where I was maxed out. As it turns out, I think I'm handling them well, without any days where I'm ready to check out by 4 or 5 p.m. "Pretend I'm not here," is what I tell the family on those occasional days. Ed King (King's Gym) said that one mistake beginning competitors make is to do too much, too soon. So I felt this confirmed my initial concerns. I guess I could argue that I've lost some fat and replaced its gravitational pull with muscle, but somehow, I doubt that's the case. I'll add one day of cardio for now, and maybe I'll add another if necessary, to bring myself back up to 6 days of exercise per week.

Butt glue

Today, I returned to King's Gym and met for an hour with Michelle Csismatia, a personal trainer, fitness competitor (5th place in a show a few years ago!!!) and highly charismatic lady. She's going to be my posing coach as well as informer on all things related to appearing in a fitness show. She's warm, very high energy, has great instincts and an incredible depth of knowledge about dieting properly, where to get a great bikini and how to get the best looking fake tan. She is going to be an incredible resource. We get along well, too. She explained what the judges are looking for at a competition and how to deliver it to them. We walked through the posing routine several times and she pointed out how to position myself to show off different muscles. We spent extra time focusing on lat exposure from the front view which apparently is a key element. She also emphasized the importance of practicing at home. We'll meet again in another month. I feel like with Michelle, I have a real friend and supporter, someone who's looking out for me and wants me to succeed. In me, she has a willing and eager student. Whatever she says, I'll do. Including the butt glue. She informed me that this is something competitors roll on their butts to make their suits stick to them, to prevent wedgies and other undesirable movement. Who knew???

Self doubt

Ed King, my trainer from King's Gym, chatted with me for a few minutes Monday before we started training. I shared with him my impressions from the competition and admitted to wondering what the point is in throwing yourself into a contest that you will likely not win. He hears this often from first time competitors, he said. The objective is not necessarily to leave with a trophy, he advised. It's an experience from which a person can take away several rewards, one of which is the achievement of a goal - simply to train and to compete. But also, the process of getting up in front of a large group of people wearing very little can build confidence and that can spill over into other aspects of a person's life. In my case in particular, with my specific deficits (my words, not his), he said that this is an uncommon pursuit requiring me to overcome certain obstacles and therefore, is something for which I can be proud. So all this set my mind at ease. I think that just looking like I belong among this group of women who have trained hard and stuck with their program is to be in extremely good company and offers a measurable accomplishment...provided that I do, in fact, look like I belong. Tomorrow: posing practice at King's Gym with a trainer named Michelle.

The Diet

I solved the protein powder problem. I switched brands and now I'm able to drink it dissolved in water. No need to fuss with shakes. Just mix and gulp. I ate very well last week, emphasizing lean protein, consuming veggies and limiting carbs to just a few like quinoa, sweet potatoes, brown rice and whole grain bread (with peanut butter because Glenn banished my reduced fat cream cheese). Restaurants can be a challenge, but Friday night I ate well, without compromising the culinary experience. I had pecan crusted trout and veggies. However, Saturday night I had a little trouble. We went to Maggiano's for a 7 p.m. reservation. I ate well the whole day but by that hour, I was hungry. They seated us a little late, then it took forever to place our order and for the food to arrive. When the bread showed up, I just took a little piece. Then another little piece. The evening unraveled from there. I ordered chicken piccata which was a safe choice (heavy on the lemon juice), but there were lots of other temptations on the table and I couldn't resist them because I was hungry. So I just wrote the night off as a dietary transgression, knowing that I'll be back on track the day after. I can report though that I didn't have any dessert, even though some cheesecake was staring me in the face. And I LOVE cheesecake. But being committed to a goal means making these kinds of sacrifices. At this point, I'd say that I'm hungrier to meet the goal than to consume the dessert.

The Competition

Wow, the show I attended today was a little shock to the system. The issues: everyone looked great and there was a surprisingly large number of women competing. I lost count because there were so many groups and each group had about 24 women. For the figure competition, the contenders were divided into 3 ages groups, 35-39, 40-49 and 50 and up. The competition among the 40 year olds was fierce, meaning that a large number of competitors looked great. Among the 30somethings, there was a range of shapes, with some looking better than others, but those others didn't look too bad. The 50 year olds looked amazing, too. What qualifies as amazing? Lean and defined. The differences between competitors in any group related to proportions, some being more defined or better balanced overall. What I couldn't figure out is how the judges make their choices when there are so many people with everything together. But invariably, there are a few standouts. The judges frequently ask people to trade places so that they can compare the ladies side by side. From what I could tell, it looked like the majority of the women were nervous. Many seemed stiff and a bit like a deer in the headlights. I'm sure there were numerous first-time competitors up there. The ones that appeared more relaxed likely were more experienced, or they had a huge amount of confidence, or both. I didn't expect to see such simple hairstyles, although there were a few exceptions, but it honestly made no difference. Either you have the right figure or you don't - your hair won't save you. One interesting sighting was a spray-on tanning service off in a corner of the school where the show was held. And 99% of the competitors had fake tans, either from the spray technique or a bronzing solution. At first it looks very weird, then its novelty wears off and those without the fake tan are the odd ones. All the girls had the same style shoe, a high clear heel with minimal straps. I guess the idea is for the shoe not to distract. The bathing suits, however, were highly ornate with rhinestones and sequins glittering from all angles. The numbers participating in the bodybuilding were miniscule. Most of those women were clearly bulkier than the figure competitors. But a few didn't necessarily belong there. Maybe they got the same advice I did: you stand a better chance of placing in bodybuilding than you do in the figure competition, based on the number of entrants. I don't think my body type conforms to those demands, so I'm sticking with the figure category. A curious sight...women leaving the competition carrying full length mirrors, like the kind attached to the back of a door. Also, women hauling large duffel bags or luggage on wheels....what's in those things? What did they need besides some make up, a brush and a change of clothes?? The male competitors stood in stark contrast to the women...much more playful, looser and more disorganized with some guys facing left when others faced right during the posing. The women had frozen smiles the whole time they were on stage which made me think their faces must hurt once they strutted off. What I'm taking away from today is the knowledge that the competition is extremely tight, that some women have unbelievable genetics allowing for incredible muscularity and definition and that the key may be to not take it all too seriously because the majority of the people there will be losers. This is not a commentary or referendum on their looks. It's just that someone else had a little more here and a little less there. Right now, all I'm wondering is what I'm going to look like 6 months from now.

Conclusion and Reward

Today marks the end of my first week of serious training. I spent four days in the gym and now I take the weekend off for recovery. It's important to give muscles the chance to repair themselves, otherwise, a person can overtrain which means that the muscles are broken down and don't have the opportunity to build back up. Obviously, that's counterproductive. My rewards come in two forms tomorrow...one is a 90 minute massage (something I do every other week, a luxury but also a necessity) and the other is attending a professional qualifying bodybuilding show. This is for serious competitors and it's the same show I will compete in six months from now (the sponsor offers it twice annually). I'm looking forward to the chance to see what the competition looks like. I expect it to be a daunting but highly motivating experience.

Dropping body fat

My day started with a text message at 9 a.m. from Glenn, one of my trainers (www.bodywize.net). "U better bring it today. Gonna whoop up on ya." First, I was excited. This felt like a dare and that's highly motivating. Except later, I started thinking that all his workouts are tough, so what exactly is he going to do with me today that will qualify as harder?? I had a little nervous anxiety leading up to 11 when we met at the gym. His method is to follow a circuit of about 5 exercises that tap each muscle group, then repeat the circuit 3 or 4 times. We started with bench presses of 65 lbs. I severely struggled as I approached rep #10. We used a lat machine, then he had me squat with 15 lb. dumb bells on each shoulder, followed by a leap up. He brought a 25 lb. bag of grain which I held on alternating shoulders as I lunged forward, alternating legs. For two of the circuits, I raised it overhead. When it was over, I felt quite a sense of accomplishment. Then he told me we need to take a measure of my body fat to determine how much weight I need to lose and at what rate. The results: 26.75% body fat, 83.5 lean mass and 30 lbs of fat. I need to get to 10 or 11% body fat. That works out to be a loss of about 12 lbs. I weigh 114 now. The goal is to lose the weight at a rate of 1/2 lb. per week, giving me 22 weeks to get the job done. That lands a few weeks before the competition which is a reasonable amount of time. Which is not to say that it will be easy. At the same time that I'm losing fat, I will be gaining muscle (and muscle weighs more than fat). It's all kind of abstract, but I left with one piece of concrete information, courtesy of Glenn. No more Prego on my whole grain pasta. :< Instead, he recommends using vinegar. Yikes.

Protein powder

I met with Ed King, owner of King's Gym (www.kingsgymohio.com) two days ago for a boxing workout. It was intense, as it always is. We're maintaining weekly hour-long training sessions on Mondays, and he'll change our workout each time. For the boxing workout, I wore gloves and he wore some body armor that protected the front of his torso. I thought that might have been a little excessive because I don't punch hard or well, but he said I should punch with force. My jabs and hooks really couldn't hurt anybody, but I gave him what he asked for. I still think he would have been fine without the armor. Anyway, he looked over a list of everything I eat and recommended that I take more protein powder. Two scoops a day is where I should be. So my present challenge is how to consume it. I ordinarily put the vanilla flavored variety in my oatmeal for breakfast, but I eat that every other day, which is not enough. Last night, I tried putting it in a cup of tea (I know, ick!), but there is such a thing as vanilla tea.... I dumped the scoop in and heated it in the microwave. OMG! The powder turned into something resembling tofu! I dumped it out and tried again, this time dissolving it first by stirring. That worked. I drank it all. But I had a sneaking suspicion that protein powder probably shouldn't be heated. I looked it up on the internet and discovered that no, it shouldn't be. That denatures the protein. So I'm struggling a bit to figure this one out. I did dissolve it once in water and drank it straight, but that was a little challenging. Today, I put it in my cottage cheese with tons of fresh strawberries. Um, I might be able to get used to that. But I still need some new ideas.

The Challenge

I had a stroke when I was ten years old which caused paralysis on my right side, also known as hemiplegia. What most people don't realize about this condition is that it's a loss of three components - strength, feeling and control, all things that are separate and independent of each other. I also lost the peripheral vision in my right eye for about an hour, and I suffered aphasia which manifested itself with a loss of control over the words that I spoke for roughly 30 minutes. After about ten days, I regained the sensation on my right side, then the strength gradually returned after a few months, but the control never came back completely. I'd estimate that I have about 50% of the control over my right arm and 75% over my right leg. The deficit in my leg doesn't interfere with walking, only driving, so I use my left foot. I have a tremor in my right arm that necessitated switching to being left handed. I'm skilled at managing the problem, and it doesn't really affect every day life, but it can be a nuisance, an obstacle and a distraction. However, I don't let it stop me from pursuing my interests, provided my ambitions are not too crazy. I'd fail as a waitress and a secretary, too, because I type with one hand, neither accurately nor quickly most of the time. This problem doesn't impede my ability to lift weights, though some machines are harder for me to control, like those that do not follow a track, allowing for extra movement. Therefore, I don't use those. With the posing required for competitions, I may have an extra bobble here and there, but I'm not going to let that stop me.

Clarification

There are several categories in which women can compete including "bodybuilding," "fitness" and in some shows, "bikini," though all competitors wear bikinis. The categories are distinguished by the standards to which the participants are held. Bodybuilders are the bulkiest. They also compete barefoot (eeeesh!). Fitness folks are well defined, but not as bulky and they compete in heels. Hello, that's me. I love heels, I have lots of them and I wear them whenever I go out, provided it's not to the gym (or bank, grocery store or dry cleaners). I'm not sure what the bikini standards are but I think they're basically about looking good in a bikini and that's more about dieting than muscle conditioning.

Why?

I'd like to offer a nice, succinct reason for why I want to compete, but I don't have one. I suppose there are numerous reasons why I want to do this and they have nothing to do with narcissism, as a friend kindly suggested might be one explanation for involvement with this activity. That definitely is not what's going on with me because I'm highly self critical. So self improvement is part of it. I also enjoy challenges. One of my trainers referred to bodybuilding as an extreme sport. I certainly don't consider myself an extreme person so I suppose this is taking me a little out of my comfort zone, but I like that element. A long time ago, I taught aerobics for about six years, but I burnt out toward the end of that stretch. I become bored with exercise after long periods, so it's important for me to change things up. Bodybuilding qualifies as a big enough change. I also appreciate transformation - going from this...to this, in whatever context applies. I expect some transformation to occur and I look forward to it.

Bikini Shot #1

This is my starting point. I'm not very good at posing, so that will need some work. Maybe it looks easier than it is? Or, more likely, it just doesn't come naturally to me. I've learned that pose practice is part of the training that goes in to a competition, so I think it's safe to say that it requires some skill. Anyway, this shot will help document my progress.

The Goal

Right now, my goal is to compete for the first time in a drug-free body building competition in October 2010. I've been involved with weight training for nearly two years, guided by trainers who also have personal experience with competitive body building. I trust and rely on their knowledge, but I also work independent of them at a local gym. My workout week has consisted of three days at the gym, spending about 45 minutes devoted to full body strength work. On the other three days of the week, I use dvds at home for cardio conditioning. Most of these video routines involve light hand weights. I take one day off each week, usually Friday or Saturday. This schedule is my ideal, and I can't say that I adhere to it every week because sometimes life just intervenes and I need to sacrifice a day. But this regimen matched my previous goal of total body fitness, including muscle growth and endurance. However, things are about to change. With my new goal of competing, my workout week is soon going to grow to 4 days in the gym and my diet will undergo some transformation, though not in horribly dramatic ways. I already am a healthy eater, both by my own standards and likely according to others' as well.